Midlife

In case you missed it on 60 Minutes, this is Andy Rooney’s opinion on women over 40: “As I grow in age, I value women over 40 most of all. Here are just a few reasons why: A woman over 40 will never wake you in the middle of the night and ask, ‘What are you thinking?’ She doesn’t care what you’re thinking. If a woman over 40 doesn’t want to watch the game, she doesn’t sit around whining about it. She does something she wants to do, and it’s usually more interesting. Women over 40 are dignified. They seldom have a screaming match with you at…

The online magazine DivineCaroline is having a “Love This Site!” Contest for blogs. Do you love the Queen? Then please go here and vote today!!!

Check out this interesting piece of research on this topic.

I wrote a few weeks ago about discovering that I am a highly sensitive person, and how reassuring that was to me. This week I had a new insight about myself connected to this previous discovery. For as long as I can remember I have wondered why I so rarely feel comfortable in group settings. Even in my family of origin, I have sometimes felt uncomfortable, like I didn’t belong somehow. Noisy discussions always made me want to run away, and aggressive people sent me running for cover. I used to regularly escape into my books. Now I belong to a writing group where I often sit and wonder…

“There came a time when the risk to remain tight in the bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.” -Anais Nin I’ve been thinking a lot about my own process of becoming a writer lately. And now I realize that this process is not so different than becoming an authentic human being. For example, the first line of an instructive article on finding writer’s voice states, “Good writers develop a style and sound that is unique to them. It’s called voice.” This is really not so different than the process we all go through from birth. We learn to…

Out-of-pocket caregiving expenses cost on average $5,500 a year, and are probably higher.

Former British Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher has dementia, her daughter says. Is it right to discuss her condition publicly?

Could transforming how we pay for aging be the baby boomers' next big act?

With the presidential nominating conventions under way, a look at the candidates' positions on long-term care for the elderly.

A public service advertisement about the impending transition from analog to digital TV is targeting the elderly.

by Celeste Lindell of Average Jane Today I had the good fortune to see a presentation on brainstorming by Sam Harrison as part of a creativity symposium at work. He shared all kinds of valuable tips about encouraging the creative process, but one section resonated for me as particularly applicable in midlife. He asked us three questions [...]

by Karen Batchelor of MidLife’s A Trip Peri-menopause was the first stop on my midlife trip.  It rolled in when I was about 45.  I remember visiting my doctor because I was having night sweats.  I told him I was in menopause. Knowing me as he does (I’m a doctor’s daughter), he took my astute “diagnosis” with [...]

By Ellen of A Girl’s Garden of Menopause Dear Inexorable Passage of Time, We had a deal. I would be giving up wide-eyed naiveté, an unfurrowed brow, and my original jawline. In exchange, I would be compensated by encyclopedic wisdom and unflappable serenity. I can’t find my copy of the contract but I’m damn sure those were [...]

by Celeste Lindell of Average Jane Around 2001, a friend invited me to cook something to bring for dinner to the residents of a Ronald McDonald House. It turned out to be a service project of the Soroptimist Club, a businesswomen’s community service organization dedicated to improving the lives of women and girls. Soroptimist, which means “the [...]

MidLifeBloggers continues to grow and evolve and become its own thing.  Right now the Orange Tent seems to be sheltering a lot of writers, and that’s good.  That’s the way I meant it to be.  But writing is only one things we blog about and it’s only one means of expressing the stuff of midlife.  [...]

If you have wrinkles under your eyes, consider this home remedy before you splurge on more expensive products. Some people say it really helps, and nobody I know has ever said it hurt anything! Smear a dab of honey under each eye and leave it on for about 10 minutes. Then wash it off with tepid water mixed with a little bit of apple cider vinegar. The vinegar acts as a toner. Try it and let me know if you get positive results! We also have some more suggestions for homemade facials. wrinkles, home remedies Share This Technorati Tags: wrinkles, home remedies

Underlying Notes By Eva Pasco I have a special post. Eva Pasco, the author of Underlying Notes visits Over50Web.net! Read her personal message to us, and then go ahead and read more reviews and get your own copy of Underlying Notes by Eva Paso: Eva Pasco’s Link To Underlying Notes at Amazon From Eva Pasco: An Acerbic Twist of Lime “…More than a cocktail for hot flashes and fluctuating libido, Carla Matteo’s introspective journey along the Second Act of Life propels UNDERLYING NOTES by Eva Pasco, a bittersweet …” O-o-o-ps! I must have had one of those…

In my other incarnation as an insurance agent, I always advised clients to hold onto any life insurance they had. Life insurance that was purchased at a younger age was almost always cheaper than any policy purchased at an older age. I could not save them money by replacing their policy, and replacing a policy that agents really needed to justify to their brokerage, life insurance company, and maybe even to the state they were licensed in. However, life insurance rates are dropping these days, and you may be able to find a better deal on term life insurance for older people. You may also…

In the insurance industry, health insurance for those who are to young (or not qualified) for Medicare is called Under Age Health Insurance. That probably sounds sort of funny because most people associate underage with “underage drinking” or something like that. But in this case, a 64 year old still gets under age health insurance. So if you have been feeling your miles lately, rest assured that you are still too young for federal health insurance! But those middle aged people, or baby boomers, are a tough crowd to find individual health insurance for. Premiums will be higher…

Coffee Is Good For You! Well, I am glad to read what I already guessed. Coffee will not make you die before you time. It’s a good thing too, because I find that coffee is about the only “bad habit” of my youth that I have not given up, and it just seems to cruel to have to do that. Oh, that and hot showers. I doctor told me my skin would not get so dry if I gave up steamy showers. Ugh. I kept the coffee and hot showers. I mean, really…. The article is on Yahoo Health– No higher death risk from up to 6 cups of coffee a day! Do I drink 6? Well, I probably stop…

Although I’ve always been a newspaper junkie and I also like reading the results of studies, I especially like to talk to ‘real people’ to find out what’s really going on in the world. Let me give you an example. The other day I was in my friend Jeff’s bike shop in Jamaica Plain. It’s a small shop that seems to specialize in Fuji bikes. Anyway, I was waiting for a bell and a basket to be attached to my bike and I got talking to one of his customers. It was a woman from the neighborhood, 75 years old, who had pulled her old bike out of the basement and was…

I have pretty much stopped buying bottled water. As you know, I have a seltzer maker that I love. And when I want to drink ’still’ water (as they sometimes call tap water in fancy restaurants), I use a Brita filter on the kitchen faucet. Turning my back on bottled water is part of a very positive trend. Whole American cities, in fact, are curbing their use of it. I keep a heavy-duty plastic bottle (the kind you find at a camping store) filled with water and in the freezer at all times. I take it out when I need it, and refill it and put it right back in the freezer when I’m…

AARP, the organization best known as torturer of 49-year-olds, turns 50 this year. Born in the same year as Yours Truly, tomorrow AARP kicks off its big annual convention in Washington, D.C. You may recall that last year I liveblogged the AARP event when it was held in Boston. I had a blast! I never thought I would say that about an AARP event, but there you have it. I wish I could go to their event in D.C., which is called Life@50+ National Event and Expo and goes through Saturday (Sept. 6), but I’ve traveled a lot this year and needed to cut back. But I highly recommend it! Here are a…

I read Tayloropolis, the blog of a dynamic 25-year-old woman from Alabama who now lives in my great state of Massachusetts. She’s a history nut. Today she wrote a comeback in response to a statement made by Vice Presidential nominee Sarah Palin in 2006. Palin wrote in response to the question, “Are you offended by the phrase ‘Under God’ in the Pledge of Allegiance?”: Palin: Not on your life. If it was good enough for the founding fathers, it’s good enough for me….  My friend Taylor writes: Today is a very special anniversary in American History. …

If you’re counting on the equity in your home to fund your retirement or you’ve borrowed against your house, take heed: According to a recent report from the Center for Economic and Policy Research, a Washington, D.C. think tank, the collapse of house prices that started in 2006 has wiped out more than $4 trillion in home equity, putting a sizable dent in the net worth of millions of baby boomers. Among its more ominous findings: By next year, the average net worth of households headed by homeowners age 45 to 54 will be almost 25% less than it was in 2004. Here’s the rest of…

At approximately 8:13, a miracle occurred. The school bus came - early! - to pick up Sayer for his first day of school. He had his back pack at the ready with his new Dark Knight lunch box (yes, he chose it; no, he hasn't seen the movie.)After a disastrous open house, the details of which I'll spare all, Sayer is ready and excited to be going back at school. Sadly, he keeps asking for "Miss W", a para-professional (teaching assistant) that I know won't be in his room this year. I didn't know he felt so strongly about her until he started asking for her as school approached. Oh wait - kids…

Should "Should" is most commonly used to make recommendations or give advice. It can also be used to express obligation as well as expectation. Examples: When you go to Berlin, you should visit the palaces in Potsdam. recommendationYou should focus more on your family and less on work. adviceI really should be in the office by 7:00 AM. obligationBy now, they should already be in Dubai. expectation I have been told never to use the word "should," as in "I should volunteer more in the class room,"or "I should lose 20 pounds." But without "should" how would things get done? In these past few…

The first annual RealAbilities Film Festival is getting underway next month in New York. This festival is "dedicated to promoting awareness and appreciation of the lives, stories and artistic expressions of people with different disabilities. Discussions and other engaging programs will bring together the community to explore, discuss and celebrate the diversity of our shared human experience." And that includes not only film makers but also actors, including Sigourney Weaver of Snow Cake.Take a look at the line-up of films; even if we can't be there it is wonderful to read about films out…

A recent article, Disruptive behavior by autistic kid stirs furor, discusses how a priest in Minnesota recently banned a 13-year-old boy with autism from his church after parishioners complained about his behavior. The priest claimed that the youth was disruptive and dangerous, although the boy's mother felt that the congregation's claims were exaggerated.The article goes on to discuss a broader issue - when is it/isn't it OK for people with autism and other disabilities to be disruptive in public? What responsibilities do parents have to the public at large, and what responsibilities do…

A recent series on National Public Radio explored health and social programs in Switzerland. The final piece, "In Switzerland, An Easier Path For The Disabled" compares the life of a family in Switzerland who has a 16-year old daughter with autism to the life of a family in Massachusetts that includes two teenage daughters on the autism spectrum.Switzerland, like many other European countries, has a cradle-to-grave public support system for families. Switzerland has a government-paid disability insurance system that pays for education, behavioral therapy, household help, special equipment and…

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about the daily thoughts we have and how they influence our moods, our happiness and our lives. Having had a week away from work, friends and everything else that usually fills my daily life, I’ve had a lot of time to step back and look at myself, how [...]

I did something this morning that I had sworn I would never do again. No, I didn’t drink a quart of tequila or eat a pint of Ben and Jerry’s. I went to a Friend of the Library (”FOL”) book sale. Even though I sell books online, I avoid FOL book sales [...]

So my vacation has been relaxing and, after 7 days, I’ve finally put my job out of my mind. 3 days to go before I have to step back into the office. Ugh! I have my laptop so have been doing a lot of research on book selling, and creating a brand [...]

I broke one of my budget rules today — I went shopping at Whole Foods. It’s amazing what I end up buying there, and even more amazing what it ends up costing. I bought about 2 days’ worth of groceries & spent over $100. Salad stuff, bread, a couple delicious specialty cheeses, [...]

A couple weeks ago I wrote about how book sales had slowed down for me. I don’t know what happened over the past week, but someone turned on the spigot and I’ve been selling 30 books a day since Saturday! It isn’t easy. I work till 8pm, then come home & pack [...]

Do you know, when I set out on this weight loss journey I could not visualise the size I wanted to be. I knew that I wanted my BMI to be about 22. I knew I wanted to be thinner. I knew I wanted to be fitter. But most of all I wanted to be able to stay at a healthy weight. It is too soon to say whether I will be able to achieve my last aim but the others can have great humongous ticks next to

1. When the weather is miserable, there is no limit to the amount of tele that can be watched. 2. When the weather is hot, at least one dvd should be watched during the middle of the day. 3. Meal times must involve much raucous laughter. 4. Bodily noises will be the cause of hilarity rather than a source of embarrassment. 5. Bedtimes are non existent. 6. The sun is over the

Today* I am heart sore. I do not know why. It is day ten of our holiday and I am missing my home. The weather has not helped. I sit snuggled under a duvet, wrapped in my warmest clothes while grey skies barely permit a watery glimmer to light the room. I could do this at home, I think. But of course I could not. At home I would be busy with the bustle of everyday life. There would be

Yesterday* we drove to the beach. The ironing had worked its magic and the sun remained out stretching its golden fingers to caress the surrounding countryside. We packed the car with beach type essentials: spade, surf boards, towels, mats etc., and set off. I watched the scenery fly by as we cruised along dual carriageways. It consisted of wide open spaces with occasional clusters of shops.

Today I am in France*. It is day six of our holiday and it is fair to say that today has been a good day. The sun came out. Oh yes. But not until I had decided that I no longer wanted to sit by the pool shivering. I gathered my belongings and left the others to return to the house. I was anticipating a large pot of redbush and curling up with my latest read. And a jolly good read it is too

Over the weekend, the CTA’s Red Line trains were again rerouted over the elevated tracks (as opposed to running in the subway).  If you’re coming to Chicago anytime soon, watch out for this weekend ritual, but be careful: it doesn’t happen every weekend.  You need to observe the signs and pay attention to the announcements on the trains. For the most part, it’s pretty straightforward.  Of course, I live here and have been riding these trains regularly since I was a boy, so familiarity probably contributes to my comfort level.  However, if you pay watch the signs…

Throughout school, I was a routine daydreamer. My earliest memory of daydreaming a lot was in the second grade. The teacher pointed it out and said she was going to talk with my parents about it. Rather than worrying about the incident, I thought, “Hey, that’s great! The teacher wants to talk to Dad and Mom. My parents will be proud of me for getting special attention!” Yes, I was clueless about the context and the social implications of that request. Nevertheless, I just went back to daydreaming. During those days, my daydreaming was rather obsessed about constructing the…

I don’t remember if I mentioned it here yet (and I’m too lazy to look it up now), but I’ll be moving my home by the end of September.  That’s just two months away.  The circumstances are a bit unusual.  I don’t want to be mysterious about it, but I also don’t want to get into the details now.  It’s too complicated and involves some unpleasant experiences with extended family, so I’ll keep the lid on all that stuff at least for now. Here are a few power thoughts I’ve been using to help me stay calm, grounded, and sane during the…

At The Lost City in the Endless Universe, Unimike has an informative and thoughtful blog post about the mimumum wage and the people who are paid it.

This evening, I had dinner with my good friend Mark and his dad who is visiting from Phoenix, AZ.  At one point during the conversation, I told Mark’s dad about the ongoing drama we have with our public transportation here in Chicago.   I mentioned the notorious “Doomsday” threats we endured at the start of this year, along with the ongoing funding crises that threaten to shut the CTA (or at least most of it) down every few years.  I spared the man the details about the fare increases and service cuts. When I got home, I saw this article in the Tribune. It just never…

I saw McCain's speech tonight. I appreciate his experience as a POW and the sacrifice he made for country, but I must say, "If being held against your will and tortured in the name of America is grounds to be president, then every African-American slave should have been placed on a presidential ticket after the Emancipation Proclamation."I couldn't pass up posting this Jon Stewart video from comedy central that I found at HP. If a picture's worth a thousand words, then video's worth a million. The hypocrisy and duplicity of the Republicans this election cycle is in itself scandalous.

I shared what I thought of Palin's speech tonight and Giuliani's nonsense in the post at this link, but I wanted to also share this article from the AP: Attacks, Praise Stretch Truth at GOP Convention.It's important, if you want to vote intelligently, to separate Palin's fiction from fact.I hope that moderators of the upcoming VP debates ask Palin the following question and rephrase it often: "Gov. Palin, do you believe in separation of church and state?" or "Gov. Palin, please explain separation of church and state as reflected in the Constitution of America?" or "Gov. Palin, how have your…

I listened to Rudy Giuliani tonight and realized that Republicans believe that the only service to country is through war, that working for social justice as a community organizer and fighting for people's right to vote or fairness for families whose breadwinners have been laid off, or standing up to banks that take people's homes after suckering them into loan-shark mortgages is not worthy to be categorized as service to country. I saw that Republicans do not applaud people who fight for social justice but instead ridicule them. (Did you see/hear them laugh when Giuliani said Obama had been…

McCain's already whining, afraid to take the heat. He won't go on Larry King Live, which airs on CNN, because he and his cohorts believe CNN is not playing fair when it comes to his VP nominee, Sarah Palin. Really, this man should be asked to explain a lot more than his choice of Sarah Palin, but as it stands the venerated war hero is scared of CNN and Larry King possibly asking him a question about Palin he can't answer.This afternoon, anchorman Wolf Blitzer announced on air that McCain's planned interview with Larry King tonight had been canceled by the campaign. Blitzer said McCain aides…

The sewerage system is out in Slidell, La., and much of the electricity, reports The Times Picayune. According to The St. Tammany News, officials advise St. Tammany Parish residents to stay away for now and not return to the parish on Tuesday, perhaps not even Wednesday. Trees and debris block roads, and some roads are covered with water, a state trooper told STN. In the Times Picayune story, the reporter said that if people flush their toilets in Slidell, sewerage will back up and flood over onto the floor. Until the power's restored, folks have been ordered not to flush. "Gustav bullied St.

Yeah, well, I've got nothing for you today.  My creative juices?  They got sucked right out of my brain yesterday.  My ability to put together a coherent thought, let alone write one of my usual run-on sentences?  Zapped.  Zippo.  I've got an empty brain today.Thank you, everyone, for all the support yesterday.  Honestly, I appreciate it so much.  I was wiped out from no sleep, but I swear I could feel the energy from you guys.  The Internet is an amazing phenomenon, isn't it?  Just try to tell me that you can't bond with people from all over the world…

Here it is.  Thursday.  A day I've been dreading for quite awhile.  A day I've been wishing had already come and gone.  It has been marked on my calendar, taunting me, for some time now.  It is the first day of school for my two boys.  In past years this has meant a tradition of making them a nice breakfast, snapping a photo or two, and sending them off with both a tear and a smile in my heart.  I always make them home baked cookies to come home to on the first day of school.  They come in, chattering nonstop about teachers and friends, and rambling about needed supplies. …

Am I the new, self-appointed, sexologist of the blogging world?  It sure seemed like I was last week.  We had some great discussions about male/female communication, the gender gap, and even got as far as discussing some male courting (?) behaviors women don't care for.  Our final discussion ended with me asking my readers what they do like.  What makes you feel romantic?  What constitutes great foreplay? I thought today I'd write about my personal idea of perfect foreplay.  Just kidding! However, Briefcase?  If you're reading, I have this very sensitive spot…

I think Briefcase has a bad case of PMS.  I'm tempted to say it's been going on for a little over two years, but let's just talk about this week.  Some of my more astute readers are now saying, "Hmmm ... wasn't your car accident about two years ago?"  The answer would be, yes.  The accident was just over two years ago.  The cars collided in a dramatic, made for TV, manner and Briefcase promptly came down with a prolonged case of PMS.We'll leave that discussion for another day.  For today, let's discuss the PMS which has been plaguing Briefcase for…

Happy Labor Day!  I don't expect a lot of readers today since it's a holiday here in the U.S.  I wanted to have something here for those of you who do show up though.Since we've been having a lot of discussions about sex, the gender gap, etc. lately, I went looking for pictures along those lines.  All of these were found on the Funnyjunk website.  This first is an example of how early male curiosity begins.  The second photo proves that men are "all the same", royalty or not.  The last photo is just a picture of a (?) couch.  

Lots of moms are blogging this week about their back to school experiences with the kiddies.  Not me.  While y’all are packing lunches, driving car pools, filling out and signing forms, shopping for school supplies, handling early morning meltdowns (theirs and yours), and helping with homework, I’m SLEEPING LATE and thinking about you and thanking God we’re done with all that. I will avoid the temptation to say NEENER, NEENER, NEENER!!! Because I’m totally mature now and also because I know if I said that you’d just say, “Well, yeah, but you’re…

The little Brownie Girl Scout in me who marched in parades carrying the flag in small white-gloved hands, who saluted that flag proudly every morning in grammar school, who laid wreaths at the war memorial on the high school football field, who decorated her bike with bunting and streamers every 4th of July and who grew up so proud of America, believing with all her heart that she could do anything because she was lucky enough to be born here - she’s BACK! She spent the last eight years curled up in the fetal position sucking her thumb, frightened, depressed and, worst of all, ashamed -…

While driving through Licking County, Ohio I found myself wondering, Do Licking County residents eat tongue sandwiches?

Found while traveling through Maryland yesterday:

Nanny Goats in Panties wrote a terrific post about running away from home as a little girl. Her post brought back memories. I ran away once. I was eight. I don’t remember what I was pissed about. My kid sister probably touched something on my side of our bedroom and no doubt Mom refused to beat the crap out of her, banish her, or shave her head and lock her in the basement. She always was Mom’s favorite. Whatever, it was The Final Straw. I huffed and I puffed. I stomped outside and found myself a hobo stick. I stomped back in slamming doors and mumbling all sorts of nastiness. Mom…

What do you have your monitor resolution set at?800 x 600 1024 x 768 1152 x 864 1280 x 768 1280 x 800 Mine is  #2. 1024 x 768.

I really don't feel like working today. If I have to paint another piggy bank, I feel like I may just SCREAM. But that's my job. And I am fortunate to be able to stay at home, and make money doing something I usually love. So, enough of my whining....besides if I paint today, I can take off tomorrow. So on with the list...do paperwork for piggy banks shipping todayunload dishwasherwash dishesdesk still needs cleaned offprocess next batch of ordersstart paintingfinish a blog post or 2I am working on changing my blog look. Check out this one and let me know whatcha think. I like it cause it…

Here in our little corner of the sticks, we don't have cable or dish.  It's available, but we don't have it.  Hubby watches enough tv as it is....he doesn't need hundreds of channels to choose from.Last year when our 20 yo tv bit the dust, we got a regular tv, a new DTV. No fancy flat panel or lcd or anything like that. Just a regular tv that gets the digital tv signals.Let me tell you, when we hooked that baby up and clicked over to the digital channels, it was like God had smiled upon us. After years of using bunny ears (no lie) and having grainy pictures, we had a picture that…

I use google reader to read the blogs I like.  Now google has started blog following.  Can anyone tell me why this is better than google reader?  Or is it the same?  What.is.the.point?  If I use the following, can I drop google reader?  Or I guess I can drop the subscriptions in google reader and have them in blog following?  I am confused!  Too much for this middle aged mind with a headache to figure out....

This morning I woke up with a sinus headache and a neck stiff enough I want to cry.  Hopefully the ibuprofen will be kicking in soon.  I could use a good neck massage.....anyway, things to do today.....do paperwork for orders shipping today personalize piggy banks for shipping tomorrow schedule carrier pick up email customers orders have shipped laundry go to orchestra meeting start cleaning 8 piggy banks maybe fire those clean my desk off I think that's it.  At least for now.

Anyone who is following me on twitter, can see that I'm completely disgusted with McCain and Palin. I watched Guiliani and Palin's speech last night and had to turn it off before McCain spoke. My blood pressure has probably gone up with all this nonsense.I CANNOT even believe that they were laughing over Obama having been a community organizer. Laughing! Wasn't Martin Luther King Jr. a community organizer? Would they laugh at him. Actually, probably. They didn't want to make his birthday a holiday. And then having the nerve to "remind" us that Republicans were the ones who ended slavery. Yes,…

I know that this is not what booksellers want to read. Over the past few months, I've been increasing my visits to my local public library.The library system in Quincy is excellent. The main branch was renovated a few years ago. It's just gorgeous.There's a cafe in the lobby. It has an atrium ceiling filled with light and they have all sorts of programs. One of them, which looks very interesting to me, is called Cooking With Books, where people look at new cookbooks and share recipes. This month's theme is Apples. Yum!Anyway, I've taken out several good books and DVDs. There's such a wide…

Those votes are starting to trickle in. However, I could still use your help over the next couple of days. You'll need to register at the website in order for your vote to count. Click here to vote.Here is the current state of the voting as of 11:40 am.I'd go back for two (maybe three) scoops! 20 votesJust one scoop, please. 11 votesThis isn't quite my flavor. 19 votesThank you for your support!Anali's First Amendment © 2006-2008. All rights reserved.This Post's Link

Remeber this post with a recipe for some delicious Vanilla Coconut Ice Cream?Well, I tweaked the recipe and entered it into this Recipe Contest on Apartment Therapy's The Kitchn.Please check out my entry here. I'm Entry #26 in the Best Lick! 2008 Ice Cream Contest.Any votes for me would be very much appreciated! I think voting is only allowed for a couple of days. And the last time that I checked, there was much room for improvement.Also, there's no Flickr Friday this week, but I might bring it back every few weeks or so.Anali's First Amendment © 2006-2008. All rights reserved.This Post's…

View Larger MapFor some reason, I got it in my head, that I could take Route 93 North from Quincy to Rockport. That is most definitely wrong. Because I have such a horrible sense of direction, I normally have the good sense to print out directions. But I was feeling relaxed and carefree and thought I remembered the basic way to get there. Serendipity would take care of the rest. Well, it did in fact, but we never made it to Rockport and we accidentally left the state. So G and I are in my Bug cruising up Route 93. The sun is shining and there's a warm breeze blowing. In New England, we savor…

As part of our creativity symposium at work today, Stanley Jordan performed and spoke about creativity in terms of music. I've been a fan of his since his first album came out in 1985, and watching him play live was nothing short of amazing. Enjoy his jazz-flavored performance of Led Zeppelin's "Stairway to Heaven:"

Last night we auditioned our rhythm guitarist's brother to take over on bass. I've known him since we were both teenagers because he played rhythm guitar and sang in a band with my mom back then. Long story short, it looks like he's going to work out great. He'll to have to hustle to learn all the tunes in just a few weeks, but he's willing to put in the effort. If you're in the Kansas City area and I haven't already invited you to the "Sleep is for the Weak" book signing with my friends, editor Rita Arens of Surrender, Dorothy and contributor Kelli Oliver George of Rancid Raves,…

We started our current band in late November of 2007. We are now on our third lead guitarist and I just learned that we need to immediately begin a search for our fourth bass player. This despite the fact that we finally have four sets ready and gigs booked. In the immortal words of Roseanne Roseannadanna, "It's always something." All bands are creative endeavors, even if the members are "just" playing other bands' music. That means there are four or five creative temperaments struggling to get along, form a consensus, communicate effectively, and put in the necessary…

Here's a funny story about an unexpected functional change in my Pampered Chef Chillzanne platter brought about last week. As it happens, the tray was too large to fit into my current freezer anyway, so no harm, no foul. It reminded me of another incident that happened years ago. We had company coming over and I didn't really have time to wash dishes, so I put my large cutting board, a painted holiday tray and some other miscellaneous housewares in the oven to get them out of the way. I'm sure you see where this is going. A day or so later, my husband decided to turn on the oven and cook…

It's been a long time since I posted a recipe, so I got out my recipe box and started looking through my old family recipes to see what I could share. I ran across a good one that is not only delicious but has an interesting story and a variety of different names. As a side note: this is the current state of my recipe box. The photo doesn't even include the big stack of unsorted recipe printouts that sit next to the cookbooks on my baker's rack. It's possible I need a new system. So back to the recipe. Like a lot of the recipes I got from my grandmother, this is from the Depression era. In…

No one would deny the power of words, but like all powerful tools, words can be used for good or evil. And sometimes, our failure to use our words carefully can hurt others and our relationships with them. We've all had experiences with people who purposely use words as weapons, but we've also known those whose simple lack of ability to think before they speak unwittingly leads them to embarrass themselves or offend others. I was reminded of this quality recently by the story of a friend of mine. A friend of a friend had recently become a non-friend because of her tendency to have whatever…

As a Democrat, my initial reaction to John McCain's choice of running mate was one of disbelief quickly followed by wicked glee. A "hockey-mom" from Alaska, mayor of a town of all of 9000, an inexperienced Governor who is still trying to get a handle on things? (Snort) How awful and yet, for the Democrats, how wonderful! McCain just blew a hole in his own sinking ship!. Woohoooooo!! That was my initial reaction. Then I thought a little more about why he chose Sarah Palin. And that thought process led to a dark and scary place.

As a society, we are fascinated by gadgets of all kinds. Laptop computers, digital cameras, iPods, BlackBerries are our new best friends. We take them with us wherever we go, we gaze at them lovingly, we we share our deepest secrets with them. Even those of us who are technological dinosaurs, tend to at least be hip enough to have a cell phone. But, like any new drug, our high-tech toys come with potentially serious side effects. Most of you have heard that studies have linked cell phone usage with brain damage and tumors, especially in children. But that's not exactly the kind of brain…

To laugh often and much, to win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children, to earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends, to appreciate beauty, to find the best in others, to leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch, or a redeemed social condition; to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded! ~Ralph Waldo Emerson I keep this quote in my mind when I feel unproductive, unsuccessful or lacking in purpose. The last bit, "to know even one life has breathed…

There's no sense reinventing the wheel--or finding another way to say what Heather Armstrong has laid out so well. For those of you who love to diss Dooce, this is what intelligence and integrity look like: "And boom"

I'm tryin', guys, I'm really tryin' to give the Republican National Convention the same attention that I gave the Democrats. But man, those GOPeeps are making it really hard: they are so flippin' predictable. After just two days of the Convention, I could go on the air to give their talking points, that's how often I heard them repeated and repeated and repeated, ad nauseum. Why is this? They

Last night when I went to bed, I had the feeling that Sarah Palin would become McCain's Harriet Miers. The allegations that Palin's youngest son, the four month old, was really her grandson--it all seemed familiar to me and I couldn't figure out why. Oh yeah, Desperate Housewives: didn't Bree banish her pregnant daughter to a home for unwed mothers, fake her own pregnancy and then palm her

...because they make me feel inadequate. They point up the wide gulf between what my life is and how other midlife women are spending the day. Actually, there was never a point in my life when I liked national holidays. When I was a freelancer, it always seemed as if I had a deadline the day after the holiday, which meant that I got to spend said holiday bowed over my keyboard, rather than

Sarah Palin is the nail in the coffin as far as any thought I might have had about supporting McCain. I really was willing to listen with an open mind next week, but his choice of Palin as VP shows me that it's just business as usual for the GOP: pick a candidate that has some personal appeal and figure you can blind the electorate to the reality of their experience and beliefs. That's

You’re one of those rude people I try to wrap my heart around, as if there’s some special award I’d get for making you like me. But you keep showing me yet another prickly side. Your personality is all cocklebur. You only love the wounded or abased.

Your lush, bitter, sentimental, and funny novels made me ache to read them, even though you re-use characters. I waited in a sunny autograph line with your latest book heavy in my arms, and you were a pleasant guy with sunburn and an everyday mortal’s ear-to-ear combover.

I interviewed you and other celebrities at a college event, but your scruffy three-day stubble offended me and I thought your second book’s secret was predictable. I’m sorry I didn’t know your other books were better. And that I asked for the cartoonist’s autograph but not yours.

Photo credit: joelogon I’m actually lucky — the people I now work with are quiet and thoughtful. I think *I* must be the one with the most annoying habits. But over the years I’ve done my time near the pocket change jinglers, the paper crinklers, the folks with loud daily phone dramas, the emotionally needy, and the flagrantly flatulent. So I’ve memed ‘em, baby. Check it out! 9 annoying cubicle noises Slurping Fingers drumming Stirring and stirring and stirring and STIRRING coffee Squeaky chair Juicy throat clearing Humming Sniffles Loud ringtones Knuckle popping…

You were a quiet big girl in homemade dresses, playing in the band. Then you were gone for a school year. Some said you’d had a baby and given it up. You never explained, and I didn’t ask. Your face was sad, easy to blush, and bitter.

If you’re not confused, you’re not paying attention. — Tom Peters Love her or hate her, we had a lot of time to get to know Hillary Clinton. Within the past week, like a rabbit out of a hat, Sarah Palin appeared at the podium and on magazine covers. Smoke and mirrors? I’m not sure what [...]

Manners are a sensitive awareness of the feelings of others.  If you have that awareness, you have good manners, no matter which fork you use.  ~Emily Post Is it impolite to chat on your cell while grocery shopping or dining alone in a restaurant? How long should you tolerate being on hold for “call waiting”? How [...]

“So long as you write what you wish to write, that is all that matters, and whether it matters for ages or only for hours, nobody can say.” — Virginia Woolf, A Room of One’s Own Fall doesn’t officially begin until September 22. But as far as I’m concerned, summer ends as soon as the kids [...]

“It will be hard watching her get on that bus for the first time,” my friend Jen (not her real name) confides. Jen’s firstborn starts kindergarten this week.  She and her adorable daughter have purchased all the necessary school supplies, including a new lunch box and a coveted neon-pink backpack from Target. “I’m just not [...]

“It is important to tell, at least from time to time, the secret of who we truly and fully are, because otherwise we run the risk of losing track, and little by little come to accept instead the highly edited version which we put forth in hope that the world will find it more acceptable [...]

I know people everyday are trying to cross the border to get into the US. This is the MOST creative I have seen. Now, before I show you  HOW to cross the border without getting caught. Keep in mind -I live in Colorado! Also of note.... I dont recall a HUGE fire here that was so bad, we needed help from Mexico- to put it out..Pretty SNEAKY! Lights and sirens cross the boarder and all the way to Colorado!I took the picture in a Kohl's parking lot.  No, smoke was seen. I wonder how many firemen were on the truck anyway....Seen anything weird…

Don't you hate it when you go into the doctors and they ask, have you had any "unexpected weight loss?" Maybe they are holding the chart upside down, maybe they just can't do math... but usually if the number is bigger than the last time you came in- the answer would be, no - my reply is generally, "no and did I have any expected weight loss.... either, just in case you were wondering..."THAT WAS ALWAYS my answer... UNTILA couple weeks ago I went in to my doctors. Got on the scale and did a double take.. WOW, I knew my clothes were looser... but I just lost ten pounds..(Better than winning a…

When I was a little girl, my father and mother used to take my sister and I to the beach. There was nothing I loved more than jumping the waves! Oh how I loved the ocean. I still do!My father and I would jump the waves and he would often tell me what to do incase I got caught in a rip tide. I would listen, but didn't think much of it as I was just a child and I knew my father was close by. There were times the wave caught me and I went tumbling to the shore, but I would get back up and go in for more.Years passed, my father long since gone from my life.About eight years ago, my family and…

I watched the DNC convention. I was hoping for a little more from a candidate that touts change. I was a little bugged when Obama said, "I will detail how I am going to accomplish these things" but he didn't.... it was generalities ... nice words... but no meat. I could do that... I mean what If every time I blogged I said, I promise you this will be the best blog post ever..but I never did anything more, I never typed anymore than a variation of that one sentence. ..how long would it be before you deleted me from your google subscription? (HEY don't delete me!) Did you know subscribing to my…

I dont know how many of you read BeesWax's blog, if you arent a current reader- you are missing a GREAT blog! She is very witty and fun! Anyway, she has a Chinatown Special... Check out her blog for her Coach purse give away! Click here to enter!

How appropriate that my last post before starting my blogging sabbatical coincides with a discussion about the book Eat, Pray, Love: One Woman's Search for Everything. I've been a regular participant of the Barren Bitches Book Brigade because I like the opportunity to reflect on and share questions and responses with fellow readers online. I tried a real life book club but the conversations always got sidetracked and lacked focus and depth. (You can read other book blog tour member responses by visiting the main list at Stirrup QueensNow before I dive into my thoughts about Elizabeth…

15-44. That's a category I just left in the dust. Normally I don't pay much attention to age-related categories but this is a biggie. It's the standard measure of child-bearing age. The U.S. Census bureau uses it. The National Center for Health Statistics uses it. The government of Scotland, for Pete's sake, uses it. And I'm now outside of it. Yes, turning 45 in June raised a whole bunch of combustible issues where infertility is concerned. It's one thing to be 29, 33, 36, 38, 40 and trying to cope with the "I" word. Each age has its own unique challenges -- it's quite another to be 45. When…

The upside of vacation is time to think. The downside of vacation is time to think. And I've been doing more thinking than usual. That usually gets my husband nervous. And for good reason. Toss in a little PMS and I can be all but combustible. Poor man, he really deserves a peaceful vacation.Most months I can read the telltale PMS signs. They're like most signs -- orange with black letters. When the hormone monster begins to take shape I make it clear I need a wide berth. I advise accordingly. (I'm nice that way, I think it's best for everyone to know what they're dealing with ... you know…

Will be mostly offline this week to take in some clean mountain air and beautiful vistas with the best guy on the planet bar none. Hiking at altitude (8,500 feet) and romantic wine and cheese picnics at sunset, by the way, are among the many things to do when one is not:in infertility treatmentfighting morning sicknesschanging baby diapers or keeping little ones from clobbering each other See, I can look at the bright side of not being able to have children. Here are two scenes we enjoyed this past weekend (and that white dot is the moon rising in the second shot). More of the same on the…

It's been quite a while (April, actually) since we had an entry for the Act of Kindness category, but that's just an oversight on my part. The "acts" have been happening from women who have been trying to figure out just what is going on inside the head of their infertile sisters. You only have to read my email to see it. So it's time to surface a few of them to demonstrate that there are some big hearts out there.From Shonda, I received this email: "...one of my oldest friends was drowning in the infertility pool. Each month she would call me with a sad report that her period had, in fact,…

Oxford gets an extra week of summer this year. Brits start shaking their heads and saying sadly, “The nights are drawing in,” as soon as it’s August, and to most people the Bank Holiday on the last Monday in the month brings the summer to an end.  (The holiday isn’t “for” anything, as I explain to Yanks who seemed a bit puzzled by the concept of a Bank Holiday, except to get a day off work – there isn’t another holiday until Christmas.) But in Oxford summer isn’t really over until the St Giles Fair has been and gone.  It isn’t clear when fair people, travelling the…

I happened to be in Chicago this time forty years ago, visiting my aunt, the last few days before I started high school.  I walked around a city buzzing with the excitement of the Democrat Party convention, but by the time police and demonstrators were fighting on the streets I was safely indoors. I grew up in an intensely political family.  My grandfather had been among those called to appear before the House Un-American Activities Committee, and my stepfather openly claimed to be a Marxist.  (I like to tell people that the house I lived in as a teenager had an 8 foot tall painting of…

Most Brits have probably already seen this by now, but Americans may enjoy hearing the Mayor of London look forward to 2012 while incidentally revealing the origins of ping pong and other Olympic trivia.  Keep watching past the introductory niceties. My Ex, who sent me the link, said I was going to have to explain Boris Johnson to the Yanks, so I’ll try. As you can tell by his accent, Boris is a toff, with aristocratic forbears on both sides of the family.  Educated at Eton and Oxford, he is a journalist and Tory politician and recently resigned his seat in Parliament to run for…

If you throw out the odd seconds, the Romanian woman who won gold the other day in Beijing ran exactly twice as fast as I ran the London Marathon in 2001 (2 hours 26 minutes to my 4 hours 52). I was never an athlete of any sort.  I was the kid who was always picked last for any team (in fact sometimes the team that got me also got a few extra points to make up for how bad I was).  I never once made a hit in softball.  In basketball I broke my glasses (I claimed I was simply keeping my eye on the ball).  I came last in the 50 and 100 yard dash, and I don’t think anyone ever asked me to…

The Baby and I were talking about my father, her grandfather, whom she barely knows. I was trying to remember when she had last seen him, but she was very clear. The last time I was there, she said emphatically, was when you went to the CIA by accident. Right. I had almost forgotten that. I had taken the two younger children, my son the Actor (then about 15) and the Baby (10), on holiday to the USA. Among other places, we went to my father’s house in northern Virginia, partly to visit with him, and partly so I could show these British children some of their American heritage. One morning I…

Why Elizabeth George isn’t a mega-famous writer I will never know.  Maybe I’m wrong; maybe she is. All I know is that if I were at a party and mentioned Stephen King or Nora Roberts, everyone would know who I was talking about; if I mentioned Elizabeth George, I bet I’d be met with many more blank looks. Which is a shame, because she’s one of the finest writers I’ve ever ever ever read. Even if you are a mystery lover, you may not have read Elizabeth George. This is because, while she is an American writer, she writes mysteries in the English style.  American…

Does this ever happen to you? You reserve a whole big honkin’ list of books at the library, knowing it will be eons before the list rolls around you, and BAM! three or four of them arrive at the same time. It happens to me all the time. The plus side to this situation is that I have gotten to read some fabulous books, albeit quickly. But the novels were so good that I would’ve read them quickly anyway because I was so invested in the story. Does this mean I let my children watch movies and play video games rather than spend quality time with them because I was immersed in a book?

Since, y’know, I’m always right on the pulse of this whole Internet thingy, I actually DID hear about Dr. Horrible’s Singalong Blog, an Internet-only musical film, before the film went live, as it were. After all, it’s a creation of Joss Whedon, genius behind Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Firefly. Of course, the date the first episode was released, I had something going on - don’t even remember what - and (shamed head-hanging here), I missed it. I was prepared to take my lumps and wait for the eventual DVD release, since I don’t have a video iPod, when like…

Let’s discuss for a moment, if you will, the road trip. A trip taken by car that spans many hours, broken up only by meals and bathroom breaks. On the way to the destination, excitement over the trip can trump boredom and frequently little or no reading intervention is required. But the way home is another story. Scenery - already seen it once. Sorry. Conversation - I’ve lived with these people 24/7 for a week without interruption; there is nothing new to discuss. It is at this point that you need a magazine chock full of interesting trivia and short articles perfect for reading…

You want a truly liberating feeling? When you find a company website that is so in touch with the tiny little insane person inside its corporate head that the company allows it free rein on its marketing. The amazing company TorsoPants is one (and perhaps the only) such company. The name itself lets you know that there are some loose, creative minds at work here. T-shirts? We don’t need no stinkin’ t-shirts. We’ll call them TorsoPants instead. When you head to their website, you’re immediately assaulted with a barrage of images: pickles, retro alien spaceships, fish.

I am gagging as I listen to the speeches of Rudy Giulliani and Sarah Palin at the RNC tonight.  I could not standing sitting and looking at their diatribes, so I've been playing solitaire as I listen to their speeches.  The pundits are calling their speech “forceful,”  I characterize it as mean-spirited, rah-rah, name-calling, and trash-talking.  (They are playing the dozens and showing that the best defense is good offense - be offensive, don't address issues, omit facts, and overlook the truth). Let’s focus on Sarah.  She rolled up her sleeves and…

A recent article in the ‘Coupling” column that appears in the Boston Globe magazine on Sundays was called “PDA? No Way.”  PDA means Public Displays of Affection.  The author, Patrick McVay, was uncomfortable with them except in extraordinary circumstances. (The piece was written a bit tongue-in-cheek, still,  it got me to thinking.)  Actually it made me remember that a few months ago, I wrote a note to myself about how few PDAs I’d been seeing. I wondered what was happening.  Was it me?  Perhaps I just wasn’t noticing them.  I’m dismayed by how…

I’ve been telling this lie for some 20+ years and now I’m tired of it…the cover-up.  I’ve decided to go for the silver – to let my white roots grow out.  I am not as beautiful as José Mateo (of José Mateo Ballet Theatre in Cambridge) or as striking as Frieda Garcia, or as stunning as legendary model Carmen Dell'Orifice (check out the video about her on You Tube).   I didn’t inherit my grandmother’s high cheeks that were strong/beautiful/alluring for her entire life.  (I always think women with high cheekbones have faces that look and photograph…

I feel lonely and so I push you away because it is not you I want.  I want who you are not:  my mother, my daughter, my granddaughter, my buddies. I want “the times they used to be” to borrow the title of a children's book by the poet Lucille Clifton.  The times that used to be - when the people I hold dearest (next to you) were near.  When we were all in such close proximity  that we got on each other’s nerves.  We do not get on each other’s nerves any more.  Visits are too precious for that.  We don’t know when we’ll see each other again…

There are moments in time when a leap forward is made.  The candidacy of Barack Obama is one of those moments.  Years and the efforts of millions of people have led to this special moment but his candidacy is a leap. One of the most important characteristics of Obama’s candidacy is his loving relationship with his wife and family.  He and Michelle are a team and they are clearly made for each other.  They give credence to the saying from the Bible about the importance of being “equally yoked.”  Look at them!  They match in physicality, intellect, values,…

News Release:McCain Criticized for Stealing Attention from Small-party CandidatesAugust 29th Only one day after the conclusion of the Democratic National Convention, the media has accused John McCain of not only stealing fellow- presidential-candidate Barack Obama’s thunder, but also of snatching the spotlight from yet another first in this political campaign: the first ever Monster Party ticket. Today, Mothman, the Monster Party presidential nominee, announced his choice of running mate–an event which was sadly neglected by the media, owing to the excitement over McCain’s announcement…

From being my baby,to being a wild young boy, always the one goofing off in the pictures and always the hard worker (Jon is in the center of the left photo taken with friends at the apartment complex we lived in while we built our house in 1975, and right photo taken soon after we moved to our land in 1976),to being big brother to Tommy,to ten years in the Army,and a first daughter,then four young daughters,to partner at Connelly & Associates, and finally, with his bevy of beautiful women. Happy birthday, Jon!The best years are yet to come!

It’s coming!The Southern Ohio Storytelling Festival, September 4-6, 2008And I will be there, telling stories, singing ballads and listening to other storytellers weaving their magic.The event is held at the Majestic Theatre in downtown Chillicothe, Ohio. Chillicothe is a beautiful and historic town in southern Ohio, best known for… The Majestic has been painstakingly restored and its grandeur is a treat to the eyes. Add that to the stories that are sure to be a treat for the ears, and how can this festival not be awesome?Storytellers include Lyn Ford, Willie Claflin, Bil Lepp, Sally…

I wrote about our cidermaking over the weekend, but there was another item on the to-do list that also got crossed off: dressing out the turkeys.Boy, did they grow! When we raised turkeys in the past we bought the poults in June, dressing them out just before Thanksgiving to be delivered fresh to our customers. But this year we bought our babies early, and by mid-August their weights ranged from 15 to 25 pounds. Time for the freezer. It's been years since we raised turkeys, so remembering how to dress them out was not easy. But as we prepared, bits and pieces came back to me. It's not a…

Yesterday evening I opened my email to find a personal, professional apology from Mr. Anthony Underwood regarding the poor service I received from a college employee in the financial aid department at West Virginia University at Parkersburg.In response to Mr. Underwood's email, and in the spirit of fairness, I am removing both blog posts about the issue from my blog. I look forward to a continuation of the friendly, supportive relationship I have had with this school since 1987.To those of you who wrote to me both on-and 0ff-line, thank you for listening. I am very glad this was resolved, and…

Last night was the first session of the class I am taking this semester for my certificate in Dispute Resolution.The class I took last semester was about Negotiation, and it was a very hands-on, practical class - we actually did negotiations with each other between classes, based on role-play scenarios the professor gave us, and all the writing for the class was in the introspective, analyze-your-own-performance genre. It was a lot of work and involved a lot of logistical wrangling to get together with classmates outside of class for the role-plays, but I learned a lot and it was even pretty…

I still have a back-to-school buzz going on, things just always feel different after Labor Day! Later this afternoon I have my first staff meeting of the year, with the teachers and counselor for the GED program I run in the evenings, and tomorrow morning is the first staff meeting of the year with the teachers and counselor for the English-as-a-second-language program I run in the mornings. Wednesday evening the GED students come in for registration, and the ESL students come in Thursday and Friday morning to register. Classes start on Monday the 8th, and we're off and running from then…

I've already posted today, so this is just a quick update for those who have been following my quest to get into better shape before I have a child!If you recall, last week I was trying to get a handle on my sugar addiction, and had decided to limit myself to two sweet snacks per day. I stuck to the plan for most of the week - had three sweets on Saturday, completely related to boredom as I had noticed the week before, but I tried to make up for it by only having one sweet on Sunday.And, it has paid off! Today the scale is at 138, one pound less than last week! Yay me!Now I am off for a romp…

My theme of the month for September is New Beginnings - starting on a clean page, turning over a new leaf, pick your cliche.September always feels like a good time to start new things to me, just like starting a new school year. I've spent more than twenty years as a student myself (grade school, high school, college, graduate school), and as an adult I have always seemed to have jobs related to education in some way. On top of that, I live in Boston - a town that literally lives, breathes, and moves to the rhythm of higher education. You can't throw a book in Boston without hitting a…

Apologies to anyone who is directly suffering or knows someone who is suffering from Hurricane Gustav or may suffer from the upcoming storms. Since I've been thinking about hurricanes I came up with this rating system for my mornings:Category 1 - I get up at 5:30, spend about an hour at my desk, shower, run through the morning routine and get everything done and everyone out the door on time. Manage to exercise and get back to my desk by 9:00 for a quiet work day.Category 2 - I don't get up until 6:30, but I still manage a shower before the kids to go to school, and everything gets…

That's right. My husband cheated on me last night